My new super power

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I have often wondered about how we are all born with special abilities in life. Some can do complex math problems in their head, some can fly planes (which I think is seriously cool) okay so this is something you learn but I am sure you are born or nurtured in to thinking I will put X number of peoples’ lives in to my hands and fly them great distances. Some like my mum can never lose their patience with their off-spring even when their youngest is 32 (me).  Take my Hriday he has this abilitiy to never be angry with me even after I lose patience with him at least once a day (okay at least 10 times a day give or take to the nearest 100.)

And then there is me… personally I blame it on the hormones.

1)    The ability to sleep standing up, sitting down, while eating and cooking except for when you are actually trying to sleep. Also while driving I slap myself awake for this fun activity!

2)    The ability to pee at any given opportunity and then some. Ability to go to loo (what we British people call the toilet) before bed, while climbing upstairs the urge to go again, maybe one last time before I actually get into to bed, while applying cream sitting on the said bed, maybe one more time just after switching the lights off and then every 10 minutes the bubba kicks you on the bladder. So here I explained about 10 minutes of my day, can you imagine the rest of the day? I give the stink eye to anyone at work who stay in the loo for more than 30 seconds. That’s how long I can last right now.

3)    The ability to shoot down any suggestion or advice from my husband. Typical conversation with my husband:

Me: I think I am getting heartburn!

Husband: well what would you normally do when you get heartburn?

Me: Have some milk.. STOOOPID!!

Husband: Okay..

Me: I am waiting!

Husband: Oh uh…would you like me to get you a glass of milk?

Me: No! I don’t want any f****** milk!

Hriday: Mummy can I have a cuddle?

Me: ‘Of course sweety come here. I love you so much!’ followed by kisses and lots of cuddles!

Husband looking a little bewildered and has a what just happened look on his face. Seriously men! At least Hriday understand how to turn me into a nice human from an ogre!

4)    Ability to grow hair faster than you can say ‘unwanted hair!’ Seriously hair on my head full, shiny, long and lustrous (which I LOVE!). Do I want to same everywhere else?

NO THANK YOU!!

5)    The ability to look sexy.

A very cute guy friend:  ‘”Wow! You look really hot!”

Me: Oh um.. thanks!

Cute friend: “No.. you look really hot!”

Me: Again…thanks but stop!

Cute friend: No… I mean you are all red! Are you ok?

Me: silently crossing him from my cute guy list!

6)    The ability to feel like crap pretty much the whole 9 months and also conveniently forgetting that you have to get it out of you at the end of it all… somehow!

7) I swear if one more person tells me I am glowing! I will lose the ability to remain calm and kick their face! Well I will try to aim for their face anyway! People its face sweat! I don’t need to be reminded of it!

So there you have it folks if you are thinking of getting pregnant and if not still do it now and I mean now! It’s so much fun! No seriously it is {secretly doing the mwahahahahaha laugh}.  Go run home or where ever that takes your fancy and just do it! You will thank me for years!  Well at least till the kid goes to college and then you will hunt me down.

Also this was my way of telling you I am 3 months away from losing all these abilities.  No adorable pictures of husband and me doing cute pregnancy announcements or photos.  I don’t want to fool anyone and also I can’t be bothered. Frankly I would rather sleep.

p.s: For the record I don’t swear- at least not in front of Hriday.  The F word used in the conversation with my husband did not contain the letters U, C and K in it… just so you know.

My name is…

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I have been thinking about this for quite some time now. Some people give themselves or are given a shortened version of their own name. For example Priyanka (my niece) often becomes Priya or Piya. Hriday I sometimes call Hridu although I don’t use it often. His friends call him Hridz (very cool)!!  Although I have noticed in India this takes a whole new dimension. Often people are called by a complete different name to what they were named at birth! Why???? It was so confusing for me! I had a girl in school whose name on the register was Mariam but when I went to her house her parents called her Yasmin! Several times I was caught out by this and it would only lead to confusion!

What got me thinking was that often people call me Sej my name is Sejal. The thing is this annoys the hell out of me! I have not asked these people to call me Sej. I mean how hard is it to say Sejal?? This also bought back memories when 2 girls in my secondary school started saying Sej, I would ask them not to but they would still do it just so they could annoy me. One day it after hearing ‘Sej’ enough times I turned back and said (now let me just say I could not have made this up! It was perfect!!!)

“Look girls my name is not that hard to say- it’s Sejal and not Sej very very simple. Also I don’t think you would appreciate it if I shortened your name to Shit and Poo without asking if it was alright to do so!”

Now I said that sentence and then realised what had just happened. Their names were Shital (Shit) and Poonam (Poo)! I kid you not! It was perfect! Had a little chuckle to myself as I was as surprised as them! Two things happened that day. They stopped calling me Sej but now the whole class who had heard the exchange started calling them Shit and Poo. This lasted until they went to college! I did feel a little guilty about this but then every time I felt guilty I would remind myself that they were asking for it! Also they stopped talking to me! Girls eh? This was all 15 years ago why do I still remember this? Just read the above paragraph well a line!

So some monikers are self-created, some by parents and some like these 2 girls are created on the spur of the moment and really girls don’t be angry with me for having such unfortunate names, blame your parents and your fate for making you friends. Frankly you were asking for it!

Loving Lately…

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I have always been obsessively obsessed with hand creams, lip balms, perfumes, anything that is pink and all things that smell great! As I grow older I think or at least I hope I have become more sophisticated in my choices of what suites my skin and hair type. My skin can go from an oily t- zone in the summer to having dry patches in the winter. I still occasionally break out but thankfully this has become less as I grow older.

I still use some of the home remedies my mum uses i.e. the gram flour, turmeric and milk face pack, clay pack made at home and to coating my hair in oil enough to fry a few puris! At the young age of 60 something ( I dare not reveal the exact age!) my mum has the smoothest and clear skin, jet black long hair and the thing I envy the most is she has never had to wax/shave her legs! What the hell Mum why can’t I have inherited at least two of these qualities ????

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4 Years…

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From a few days old to 4 years- how time flies!

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The hubster, me and Hriday!

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This one always makes me smile.

This one always makes me smile.

The kid loves Paris and Eiffel Tower and his forever building the tower with Lego bricks at home.

The kid loves Paris and Eiffel Tower and he is forever building the tower with Lego bricks at home.

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Hriday on his 4th Birthday

Hriday on his 4th Birthday

 

Hriday you are growing up so fast- wish I could stop time and just capture every single moment of you. Fell in love with you the first every second I saw you! Keep entertaining us with all the witty things you say and please don’t grow up so quickly.

 

Love Ma and Papa.

 

 

My Superhero.

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On a recent trip to Luxembourg (was visiting husband for the weekend as he has been working there for around a month now). We missed him so much (just kidding!) it’s been so peaceful around here :)

Anyway I digress I was feeling rather air sick on the 50 minute plane ride there and Hriday held my hand all the time reassuring me that he could see land from his window and we would be down soon. This was immediately followed by ‘Whoa! the plane is going up and down!’ This did not help at all! Thanks Hriday!

This made me think how kids these days are so used to flying that nothing fazes them at all. I remember being his age or slightly older and being air sick all the time when my mum and I would fly to India. Hriday seemed so natural at flying, he took it all in his stride saying hello to all the cabin crew asking every few rows whether that was his seat. Settling down in his seat he would buckle himself in and spend most of the time looking out of the window.

Hriday was only 3 months old when he took his first flight to India. We thought forget short haul flights let’s just go for a 10 hour flight and amazingly he fed and slept through most of the flight! I remember other babies on-board older than him not enjoying the experience at all. Why was he so calm? I don’t know! I have never been able to figure it out. In his 4 years he has been on as many as 15 flights and we have three 10 hour long flights coming in the next 3 months and I hope this calmness or his coolness lasts!